Crime Library: Criminal Minds and Methods

Man collared for riding child’s trike in the nude

When they found him he was chewing glass. He admitted to smoking cocaine — go figure.

Naked drunk woman shows up to jail for conjugal visit

It seems that even today, true love knows no bounds — especially after a seven-hour pub crawl.

Man arrested for getting mail nude, shaking his junk

It was a lazy Oklahoma City morning when neighbors reported seeing a man walk out to his mailbox in the buff, get the mail, and then begin masturbating for all to see. The first act was reportedly witnessed by a woman and her three children, ages 6, 10 and 12, and the second by a boy, 14, and police.

Another nude Florida guy attacks cops, this one with clock

Yes, clock, not Glock. Authorities in Florida seem to have their hands full with naked, rampaging psychos these days, the most recent of which, took them 10 minutes to cuff due to his mental state and the fact that he was fending them off with a “large clock, which had numerous sharp utensils protruding from its entire border.”

Naked driver was masturbating while texting

Back in August police in Chester, England, arrested Neal Marshall, 49, after a truck driver reported him driving his Ford Escort naked down the M56 while masturbating. His lawyer says he was texting and got “carried away.”

Naked racist peeing guy jumped out of hotel closet with fire extinguisher in his butt

An man in England was sentenced in Westminster Magistrates’ Court earlier this week for a Halloween stunt at a budget hotel in London, that no doubt left some of the Hotel’s more sensitive guests and staff in need of therapy. The headline pretty much says it all, but the play-by-play is priceless.

Slideshow: Busted in the buff

From a nude unicycle rider, to a robber wearing only chocolate, to an unclad couple in the drive through at McDonald’s, there are 8 million stories in the naked city…these are but a few.

Massachusettes Man Smashes Windshield with his Butt

The man in the car thought that the drugged out naked man running in circles in the road was funny, that is until the man launched himself “ass first” at the victim’s car. That’s when it went from funny to scary.

Kinky Sex Leads to Naked Rescue as Woman Found with Head Stuck in Stair Rails

A woman in Lipetsk, Russia, surprised neighbors and rescue workers alike when she was found on the stairwell of her apartment building buck naked with her head stuck between the stair rails.

Man Shows Up Naked to Propose — at the Wrong House

In what may be a case of mistaken identity, mistaken address, or mistaken vial of meds, Seminole County Florida man Thomas Edwards reportedly showed up at his girlfriend’s house to propose — except he was naked and it wasn’t her house, and the man in the home, who summoned police, did not know Edwards.